The Journey Begins: 4 weeks, 3 days

Well, folks, this is it! Here we are. Quite unintentionally, this blog has now moved from "potential" to "active," in other words, I'm pregnant! At least I think I am. I can never quite convince myself in the early days (positive pg test - check; eighteen days high temps - check; beginning NVP - check).

For us this is baby #3. We lost one baby in a miscarriage in July of 2005 and had our DS in June of 2006. This baby is due in early September. If she comes on the 6th, that'll make three Sept. 6 birthdays in our family!

The story:

Well, if I was superstitious, THIS would have been my first pregnancy indicator (I'm NOT, so it's not, but otherwise....). I was watching a birth video on YouTube with my son the other day (I want him to be used to them before he's old enough to be grossed out), and while we were watching the birth he turned to me and said, "Baby here!" I said that no, there wasn't a baby here, and he said cheerfully, "Baby here soon!" It did make me wonder, I've got to tell you.

Anyhow, I'm afraid the nausea started at about 3 weeks. This is bad, because last time it waited till week 5. But until I got a positive test, I had to sit around wondering if I was so paranoid that I was actually making myself sick by my fevered imagination! You see, I usually spend the last week or so of my cycle absolutely convinced that I am pregnant. I'm kind of paranoid this way. So this month, I thought, "Great. Not only am I imagining pregnancy, I'm imagining nausea. Terrific. Way to go." I wasn't able to get a positive reading till Christmas Day (that's what happens when you use super-cheap tests from the dollar store - you have to wait longer!).

By Christmas Day, I've got to say, the nausea was starting to interfere with life (And I'd just gotten a positive test! Great!). I felt more like sitting on the couch and groaning than doing anything else. It didn't take long before I broke down and got out the home-made Bendectin/Diclectin, and ever since have felt MUCH better. The stuff really works, at least for me.

Of course, this is only the beginning. Nausea isn't even supposed to BE here at 4 weeks, let along need drugs to control it. Needless to say, I am good and scared. But at least it's under control for now. I'm seeing my OB's PA tomorrow, so hopefully I can get some guidance from her. Hopefully I'll be able to connect better with her tomorrow than I did last time I saw her. She was rather cold, detached and clinical, and I can't stand that kind of professional medical relationship. I hope she warms up a bit!

I am also wracked with guilt for taking a pharmaceutical while pregnant. If you Google "Bendectin" and "safety" you'll come up with two types of diametrically-opposed articles - type #1, which claims that Bendectin is a falsely-maligned wonder-drug for NVP, and type #2, which claims that Bendectin is a teratogenic nightmare (or not that bad, but a drug which raises the chance of birth defects). So while I have the go-ahead from both my midwife and my OB on taking it, I still feel guilty and somewhat nervous.

I'll post later on how to formulate Bendectin at home so that it's available to anyone who wants or needs to make it.

The pregnancy has been a great impetus to get going on my move! Moving with a toddler is not easy, and I have packed maybe 20 boxes in the past 2 months. Yesterday alone I packed twelve! Hurray!

There's also a lot less fanfare with non-first pregnancies, I've noticed! I'm not rushing off madly to read "pregnancy week-by-week" websites like I did with DS. I'm eating lunchmeat with casual abandon. And I cleaned the catbox yesterday without even thinking about it! Such is life, I think.

We finally got through telling our families yesterday. My parents (who are helping us get our house ready) were, I think, less than pleased. My mom was cheerful, at least; my dad didn't say a word (typical, but depressing). DH's mom's first reaction was, "Um, did you plan it like that?" Reactions from church family were much more satisfactory!

And another WONDERFUL piece of news resulting from all this is that the pregnancy has effectively derailed my hubbie's plans to buy a puppy! Hurray!! (I love other people's dogs, but I do NOT like owning them - I'm just not a dog person.) He's still thinking of perhaps buying an adult dog, but that's fine with me as a compromise - no training to do and much cheaper.

So here we are! The beginning of the journey. I am hoping for a fluffy pregnancy, or at least for nausea that behaves itself and proves amenable to treatment. If you are reading this, I would appreciate your prayers!!

This is also a bit of an adventure for me, because my family is composed almost entirely of childless or only-child families. I am the first woman in the maternal line in three generations to have more than one child! So the sibling thing will be new to me.

Wish me luck! I'll check in as often as I can.